


deathbed

by HE4RTMINS



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: M/M, Oneshot, angsty, i really do not know how these tags work, like one sexual joke, mentions of cross dressing??, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 08:28:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24966724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HE4RTMINS/pseuds/HE4RTMINS
Summary: in which chan knows he only has one day left to live, but can’t tell anyone.ORIGINALLY POSTED ON WATTPAD @FROSTYMlN
Relationships: Bang Chan/Lee Felix
Comments: 8
Kudos: 39





	deathbed

**Author's Note:**

> so this is my first work on ao3, and i have no idea in HELL of what i’m doing, so i am very sorry if i manage to fuck everthing up. please tell me if i need to add more warnings or tags!!

chan woke up with a _horrible_ feeling in his stomach. he turned around in bed to snuggle up closer to his boyfriend, only to grab onto nothing. he groaned, remembering that the younger had a much earlier shift this morning. he had probably already left for work. chan rolled back over to grab his phone.

_8:46_

felix had probably _just_ left. his shift started at nine and it was a twenty minute bike ride to the mall. if only he had gotten up just a bit earlier he might have been able to catch the boy before he left. he vaguely remembered feeling a soft kiss on his cheek just a bit before he fully woke up.

and that was felix for you. little gestures like leaving gentle kisses to assure chan stayed _asleep,_ but still showing his love for him made up the younger boy. he was full of so much love and sweetness and joy. he was the most compassionate boy chan knew, and even after two full years of dating he felt he didn't deserve him.

he sighed, putting his phone down. he sat up begrudgingly and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. staring at himself in the mirror across from their bed he noticed something strange.

a black **15** right there on his forehead.

it was said that a small percentage of humans had developed the power to know the day the died. the power varied from knowing from _birth_ to only finding out the day you were destined to go out. some people claimed to see it as a countdown clock, marking down how much time you had left _for you_. others seemed to just see it as a date. they had to dread and count down the months, or days, or _hours_ themselves. but none of this could ever be scientifically proven, because anyone who had the ability couldn't tell anyone they knew _personally_ that they were going to—or that they knew when they were going to _die._

it always felt like nothing more than an urban legend to chan. he thought it was extremely farfetched and honestly kind of stupid. there was no way for it to be even /possible/. and everyone who knew him _knew_ he didn't believe, so he just assumed this had to be some sort of prank. something changbin and/or jisung had put felix up to. he wasn't going to die in fifteen hours. it was silly.

he rolled his eyes, standing up and walking over to his closet, hastily grabbing a few random clothing items, and walking into the attached bathroom to shower.

##

he had scrubbed as hard as he could at the number on his head, but that thing was _not_ coming off. he tried for about five minutes straight but eventually gave up. whatever felix used must have been _really_ strong.

he washed his hair and tried to use some of the shampoo to get it off, but no luck. he turned the water up as high as he dared but _still_ nothing. he even used some of felix's extra strength exfoliating face wash in an act of _pure_ desperation. jisung and changbin had outdone themselves this time.

he turned off the steaming water and stepped out, wrapping a towel around his lower half and running his hands through his soaking wet hair. he wiped away some of the fog from the mirror only to see that the 15 wasn't even _slightly_ smudged 

he dried off his hair, got dressed, then took a selfie to post on instagram. in the hopes his friends would feel satisfied enough that their prank payed off to tell him how to get the stupid number off of his forehead.

he shared the picture.

_**chan.bang: very funny guys @han.squirrel @spearb @sunnylix** _

but once it fully uploaded the 15 was _gone_. it had completely disappeared.

he checked the mirror again, and there it was, still staring back at him.

"no." he whispered. a panicked tinge to his voice. "no." a little louder this time.

he looked down at the post again. no number. and jisung—being an avid phone addict had already commented.

**_@han.squirell: ????????????? what did we dO?!?_ **

"fuck, fuck, fuck!" he finally screamed. tears stung his eyes.

he raced out of the room, flew down the stairs, grabbed his car keys, threw on his shoes and slammed the front door behind him as he made his way towards his car.

this couldn't be happening to him. not now. not today. his life was at the best point it had probably ever been at. he had an amazing boyfriend, who he had been making plans on _proposing_ to for months now. he had a job he actually enjoyed. and his mental health had improved so much over the past year because of all this.

but he wasn't going to let the fact that this was his last day ruin it for everyone else. he was going to make sure he did it _right_.

his eyes watered as he drove towards the mall felix worked at, but he wasn't going to cry. felix couldn't know anything was wrong. twenty minutes passed and as he looked to the left to make the turn into the parking lot, his reflection in the side mirror caught his eye. the **15** had now turned into a **14.**

he swore loudly, but still managed to keep himself together. he found a spot, then hurried out of the car. walking as fast as he could to get to the entrance that was closest to the cafe his boyfriend worked at.

he walked in the door and was immediately hit with the reassuring smell of warm coffee, sweets and cinnamon coming right from the cafe.

he made his way into the shop, and smiled seeing felix right there.

"hi." he leaned on the counter, and grinned even wider.

"hi!" felix exclaimed "what are you doing here?"

it made chans heart sink that felix couldn't see the number _right there,_ and there was nothing he could do about it.

"can you ask minho if you could get a day off..." he pushed the 14 to the back of his mind. "i wanna take you somewhere."

"um, i can try? i don't think there's anyone to cover me though."

"there's always jisung." chan laughed, and felix smiled.

"you're right. i'll go ask now. i love you." he went up on his tippy toes to lean over to chan's side of the counter and pressed a kiss on his forehead. chan felt one disobedient tear slide down his cheek, but the younger boy was gone too soon to notice it.

##

ten minutes, and a slightly angry boss later, the couple were sitting in their vehicle driving down an empty road, laughing and drinking coffee that felix had stolen without minho knowing.

"so, where are we going?" felix asked curiously. it wasn't exactly unlike chan to take him away from work on a secret date, but he was surprised it was on such a _random_ day. he normally only did things like this on special occasions, but this uncommon occurrence didn't seem _too_ strange to him. and besides he was _not_ complaining about skipping work to spend the day with his boyfriend.

"you'll see." chan smiled, taking another sip of the ice coffee. "i wanted it to be special."

felix's eyes widened as it clicked in. he started to remember what he thought was the unfamiliar route.

chan was taking them back to the beach they had had their first date at.

"oh my god," felix covered his mouth. "it's been so long since we've been back here."

"i said i wanted it to be special didn't i?" they turned onto the road leading into the small town just outside of the beach. **(authors note: lmao i have literally n o c l u e where they are but just go with it shdhd)**

he pulled into the parking lot of a general store and stopped the car.

"why are we stopping here?" felix tilted his head.

"we need supplies don't we?"

##

the two walked into the air conditioned store, both sighing in relief at the change in temperature, and chan went to grab a cart.

"do you wanna hop in?" chan asked raising an eyebrow at the younger

"like _in_ the cart?" felix's eyes sparkled like an excited little kid's.

"if you want to." chan smiled

felix nodded ecstatically, trying to get in the cart himself. he laughed as he almost fell off, then he shook his head. "i don't think it's a good idea."

"don't be silly, come on." and with that chan lifted up the smaller boy and placed him in the cart.

"so, what do we need? what's our list?" chan looked at the boy in the cart lovingly. doing things like this brought such a comforting feeling, and he regretted not having more adventures like this with felix.

"well, swim suits towels and sunscreen, but i'm not sure if they'll have those"

"over there-" chan pointed to a small section, the sign hanging over top of it reading "summer".

"ok, then we need snacks and drinks. and i think that's it!"

quickly pushing felix to the snack isle, chan discovered they were the _only_ customers in the store. which meant there was little to nothing stopping them from being as loud and chaotic as they wanted to be. they were still _in_ a store, so obviously they'd never do anything _too_ crazy, but they could still have a bit of fun.

"so what should we get." felix waved his arms at the shelves full of chips, candy and chocolates.

"whatever you want." chan grinned widely. he pushed the cart closer so felix could reach the shelves.

the two grabbed as much off of the shelves as they possibly could. laughing as felix was starting to drown in the snacks.

"ok, drinks now." felix pointed to another isle, and chan pushed them as fast as they could. the two bursting out laughing again as they sped through the store.

they grabbed at least _six_ bottles of lemonade, and whether some of them were alcoholic or not was a given.

"fashion time!" felix yelled, as they raced to the "summer" section.

chan helped felix get out and they modeled swimsuits for each other.

using the isle as a runway, felix strutted down the linoleum flooring. holding a tiny bikin up to his chest. "do you like it." chan exploded into laughter, as felix smirked. "should i get it?"

"o-oh. you're serious." chan turned bright red. "if-if you want to." it was unlike felix to be confident like this, and he found it _extremely_ hot. when they got back home chan might have to add _something else_ into his grand plan of the day.

"i mean, i was kind of kidding, but if you like it _that_ much." he laughed. "i'll look at some other options first, but if i don't like any other suits, i'll get that one."

they continued modeling. chan sashaying down the isle himself, holding a pair of blue trunks, and a towel wrapped around his neck. felix had to hold himself back from screaming at him to take his shirt off.

felix showed off any swim suit he found was cute. any colour, any cut, any type. chan had always found his freedom with his personal style so inspiring. he wore what he wanted, when he wanted to. he didn't have any preferences to masculine, feminine or androgynous clothing. he wore it _all._ and he always looked _good_. it was so unfortunate that there were still so many people who looked at him the wrong way when he wore something that wasn't what they thought was "normal" for boys to wear. it was so unfortunate that because of people like those there were so many other people who wished to have the freedom and the courage to where what they wanted to, but couldn't.

chan fully hoped that after today, felix wouldn't let anything hold him back. he wanted him to become an inspiration to others, because just by wearing what he wanted, he had the power to truly change peoples lives for the better.

chan had been so caught up thinking about this and watching felix intently, he hadn't noticed he was _fully_ crying.

felix noticed and rushed over. "are you alright? what's wrong?"

"you're beautiful, that's all" he kissed the top of his head. "did you find something you're happy with?" he nodded. holding up a pair of short-ish pair of black swim shorts and a normal lavender coloured crop top.

"perfect. i'm just getting these blue ones." chan held up the first pair of swim trunks he had tried on.

"nope, i found a pair that matches my shirt!" he smiled shoving a pair of purple trunks into chans arms. " _and_ i also grabbed the sunscreen, now let's go!"

they checked out, which suprisingly didn't take as long as they thought it would, payed, packed everything into the back of the car, then started on their way again. the beach was now only about twenty minutes away, and felix was itching to get there. he missed feeling the water on his skin, and the sun beating down on him, he even missed the _sand_. it all reminded him of home.

"we're almost there." chan noticed felix becoming more restless. "do you wanna play some music?"

"sure." he grabbed out his phone and plugged it in. fiddling around on it, until finally playing the music.

chan was _not_ expecting to hear jisung's voice come over the speakers, while the freckled boy laughed manically.

"no! not this! please anything else!" chan cried, realizing what the song was.

"excuse me noona, do you have a boyfriend?" felix started singing along as chan screamed.

"please god no!"

"you asked if i wanted music!"

"i take it back! turn it off! please i'll do _anything_!"

" _anything?"_ felix smirked.

"oh god, i don't like that look. ok maybe not _anything_ but i swear to god if you don't turn this song off right now, i'm turning this car around." chan yelled. "ew, i sound like my dad."

felix's smirk grew as he said, " _daddy._ "

chan screamed again. "no! stop! stop! stop! "

##

"i love you."

the two were laying on their beach towels, among the _many_ snacks. staring at the water with the sun on them.

"i love you too."

they had been there for about an hour now, played in the water for almost that entire time, and had just now decided to take a little break.

"hey, do you wanna call hannah and lucas?" chan asked. it was one of his plans for the day, he wanted to make sure to talk to them today, to have a nice, fun conversation. he didn't want them to have to not remember their last words to him, since the last time they talked had been _months_ ago.

"sure!" felix always loved talking to chans younger siblings, and they loved talking to him. sometimes chan wondered if they loved his boyfriend more than they loved _him_.

chan brought out his phone to text hannah first. he wanted to make sure they were actually available.

 **chris** hey! do you wanna ft with me and lix?

always! i'll go get lucas **hannah**

chan smiled and kissed felix on the nose, then the phone rang.

"hi!" the couple waved as they saw the live video of the other two.

"hi!" they waved back. "where are you guys?" lucas asked squinting at the background, trying to figure it out himself.

"he brought me to the beach on a date!" felix beamed. "i got to skip out on work."

"lucky!" hannah sighed. "that's so romantic! i wish i had a boy who would take me away from work for a date!"

"that's just irresponsible hannah. not romantic." lucas hit his sister on the arm, while he glared at chan at the same time.

"whatever, lucas." hannah scoffed. "so how have you been?"

"pretty good!" chan smiled brighter. "i miss you guys."

"aww, we miss you too." hannah rested a hand on her chin, trying to get more comfortable. "it's really weird not having you here all the time."

"it's really weird not having _you_ here all the time!" chan's smile lost some of it's happiness. he _really_ missed his family. they had always been so close, and it was strange being so far away. but he was talking to them now and that's all that mattered "but felix does make up for all your tiktok dances, hannah."

felix and hannah both blushed as chan and lucas laughed.

##

the four talked for a _long_ time. about how life was, school, jobs, friends, but most importantly just random fun stuff. it was hard saying goodbye, but hannah and lucas both had things they needed to do.

"love you guys!" chan said "say g-" he was going to say goodbye but his voice got caught in his throat. he _physically_ couldn't get the word out. "—say hi, to barry and mom and dad for me."

"we will! love you, bye"

"bye!"

and then they were gone.

"back into the water?" felix asked, and chan nodded. "i'll beat you there!"

chan raced off, trying to beat felix to the water, but the freckled boy had gotten too much of a head start. so instead once he reached felix, he tackled him, spraying water _everywhere_.

the two came back up to the surface choking on the water, laughing. felix pushed chan back down. "just because _i_ won doesn't mean you have to drown me. you're a sore loser." felix pouted.

"you're a sore loser." chan splashed him. felix splashed him back. soon it was a full on _war._

they were both absolutely _soaked_ by the time they got out, and their towels were _covered_ in sand already.

chan shuddered as he sat down. felix waited until chan had settled then went to sit on his lap.

"you smart little shit." chan ruffled his hair.

"i'm very obviously the brains of this relationship." he _half_ -joked

"yes you are."

##

they spent the _whole_ day at the beach, watching the sun go down in the sky and eventually turning the sky pink. but dark clouds rolled in before they could see the sunset properly.

"we should go home." chan picked up the tired boy from beside and gently, and walked over to the car. placing him into the passenger seat, then heading back to grab their things.

the had eaten a majority of the candy and chips, but had _all_ of the drinks.

after gathering everything up, he closed felix's door, hopped into the car himself, and started on the road home. it started to rain about halfway home, and chan was having quite a bit of trouble seeing. and the drinks he had consumed earlier were _not_ helping.

he squinted at the road. the rain was falling heavily now and had covered the road in a think sheet of water.

and this was the moment chan knew it was it.

he tried his best to control the vehicle as it slid through the water, but there was no arguing with the **0** now on his head. the only thing he could do now was try to protect his sleeping boyfriend in the passenger seat.

"come on, come on." he tried his best to keep it steady and on the correct side of the road, but there was nothing he could do when another car slid too far, and slammed into them, sending both vehicles flying into the ditch on the side of the road.

felix woke up screaming, tears streaming down his face as he realized what was happening.

and that's when chan knew it was it. he laid there, his head hurting, and eye sight dimming. every part of him it seemed was covered in blood.

felix grabbed his hand, sticky with the red liquid, and smiled weakly, tears still running heavily down his face. "thanks for the best day ever."

"i'm sorry." he choked out.

felix just shushed him. "i love you bang chan."

"i love you too felix."

and then both of their vision faded to black. their breathing slowed.

they were gone.

_together._


End file.
